||[Feb. 18th, 2005|01:42 pm]
Well, so far I can't afford to get my car back. So I am still a walker. I am doing fine in diversion, it's a bit boring, but whatever. I'll live.
I have been spending a lot of time in Battleground. My cousin Joey came out from Wisconsin and is living with my mom and dad. That is kind of an odd situation. He is awesome though, I am glad to finally meet some of my distant family. I might even go back to Illinois with him in a couple months to see his mom, apparently she may have cancer. That is sad as hell cause she is the aunt that always stays in contact with me.
And on the topic of sickness, my mom's asthma is getting bad, and her bronchitis came back. She can barely sleep at night now. She stops breathing sometimes, and her throat closes up. She has some machine she has to use every four hours that opens her throat back up. It's horrible. I am really scared that I might lose her soon, and that would kill me. I am such a momma's boy. Always have been. And on top of that my brother has been sick for a little over a week now. He was crying so hard when I was there that it didn't even sound human. And I stayed up all night rocking him so he wouldn't cry. Literally all night, until my mom woke up and then my dad came home and they took over. He is getting a little better, but his life expectancy is shorter than ours due to his disabilities, and the only kid I ever knew that was like my brother died at 19, my brother turns 19 next week. And my brother has a lot of internal problems that can't be fixed. So needless to say I am a bit worried about my family. I don't know what the rest of us would do without my mom, or my brother. Hopefully I am just over reacting. I hope.
Anyways, me and my new "girl" aren't talking much. I wrote a song about her, and a started a couple other about different aspects of the situation. I guess I am venting that way about how I feel. I am a bit confused by the fact we are talking so much less. I could be over reacting there too, though. Time will tell. All I know is it was nice having someone around for a while like that. Gets the mind off all of the other stuff I have to deal with at the moment.
Alright, well that's the update, I'm going back to Battleground tonight, and off to Rainier with my cuz to see my older brother. Until then. Gone.